Convenience at the Expense of Well-being

Howdy,

Last week we discussed truth in the digital age.

This week, we're talking about a subject directly related to truth - the effect that technology has upon our mind.

I'm not that special. You're not either. That's okay.

I previously read The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*** - a Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson. There's a chapter called "You're Not Special."

The chapter breaks down how our lives are not meant to be unbelievably exciting every waking moment. For example, mundane activities such as house chores and self-care aren't riveting, but they're necessary.

In addition, there are moments in life that aren't meant to be joyful. That's okay. Suffering is inevitable. There are degrees of suffering and some suffer more than others, but make no mistake that we all experience suffering - even when we cannot see it.

Yet, our individual expectations of an unrealistic state of constant happiness are collectively on the rise - why is that?

Photo of Mark Manson (Mark Manson's site).

Technology is telling us otherwise.

We consume people's highlight reels all day long. People don't share authenticity. They share what makes them appear happy, important, and cool. You do it. I do it. We all do it.

Why? Today's tech was designed like a slot machine, on purpose, to keep us hooked.

Keep in mind, big tech refers to us as "users."

More dopamine = more times we engage with the app

More engagement = more $ for the company behind the app

It's a business decision.

We can consciously tell ourselves that what we consume online is not reality. Yet, even conscious awareness does not stop the lofty expectations we have for our individual lives from seeping into our subconscious thoughts. We simply consume too much inauthentic, low-level content to prevent our expectations from rising to a level that we cannot obtain.

The result - we're spending more time within our own heads and more time pissed off that people do not share our worldview. 

After all, when you spend so much thinking you're special, how could anyone ever have an opposing view?

Thinking you're special leads to being ordinary.

If you think you deserve a life of convenience because you are special, you will rob yourself of the very thing you need to become extraordinary - comfortability with what's uncomfortable. 

Today's tech makes it easy to lean into what's comfortable.

Amazon delivers our packages in 2 days.

Facebook/Instagram provides us with cheap dopamine in our pockets at any time.

The hardest part about ordering from Uber Eats or DoorDash is getting up from the couch.

But inconvenient, uncomfortable experiences are what lead us to self-improvement.

Becoming extraordinary requires us to put our tech away.

I'm not some snobby, anti-tech purist. If I were, you wouldn't be able to read this. There is no question that there are clear benefits to technology.

But I do believe that my mental health, and the clarity needed to organize my thoughts into a weekly newsletter, comes from my daily practices offline - meditating, reading, journaling, praying, cooking meals, doing chores, and dining with others.

Let's combat the negative psychological effects of tech - insecurity, self-doubt, and shame - through two things: humility and discipline.

Humility - the capacity to put the phone down and listen to viewpoints outside of our own because we know we're dependent upon it for greater understanding

Discipline - build habits that contribute to our well-being offline; break habits that cause us to set unrealistic expectations of our own emotions

Thanks for reading

Go build something that requires you to be comfortable with the uncomfortable,

Josh